Jay was used to the drama by now. It was the one thing he could count on to never be missing in his life. He didn’t hate it nor did he love it; he had just accepted it for what it was.
Perhaps his ability to dream helped a bit. He had been a Joseph since his childhood days and his happy place had remained as lovely and magical as the first time he visited it.
Uncle Dapo had taken him out for ice cream one day while his parents were having a row. He had looked at Jay strangely and asked him if he wanted to cry, assuring him it was okay.
Jay nodded but didn’t know how to cry. He was 9 then and really wanted to experience what it felt like to let go. But the truth was, he didn’t have it in him.
Instead of crying, he had looked at his melting ice cream and in it, he found an escape. In it, he saw himself walking up a snowy hill. But he wasn’t walking, he was running gleefully. Holding his hand was Timmy, his favourite character from a Cartoon Network show.
“This is paradise, Jay!” Timmy howled.
Jay had looked around at the whiteness surrounding them. When he turned back to Timmy, his companion was gone.
The overwhelming silence that followed engulfed Jay immediately. He sank down into the snow but it was not cold. Instead, it was more like a furry blanket that just suited the need he didn’t know he had.
Relief washed over Jay as he took in the silence and a tear fell, followed closely by another.
He was drawn out of paradise that day by Uncle Dapo’s warm embrace and coos, assuring him everything would be okay.
Nothing was ever okay after that but Jay found returning to paradise easier going forward.
As he neared 30 now, Jay’s paradise had become more than an escape. It was his only world.
He would look at the people around him and hear them throw the word “hallucination” around and he would smile. Only if they understood.
Prompt: Wonderland
