Dearest,
The day I met you would forever remain the worst day of my life.
If I could go back in time and look the other way, at my neighbour’s kids running around with paper ‘fans’, I would, without hesitation and relish the sight of childish innocence.
Or turn back to F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby I was beginning to enjoy, and happily turn those pages as if the next page held the secret location of the Philosopher’s Stone.
If beauty isn’t really in the eyes of the beholder, I would have seen you as any other girl walking down the road as the sun deeps in the sky on that Wednesday evening.
And if love isn’t so blind, I wouldn’t have melted when you looked my way and smiled that enchanting smile that has kept me philtred till now, months after you left me without a goodbye.
I wouldn’t be feeling so miserably in love with you, a love that was never meant to be.
I wouldn’t be going through our old conversations, trying to find what I said wrong to make you shatter my heart into a thousand shards.
Nor would my head be a mess as I try to bury the memory of you; the ways you took me on a ride that most people never get to go on in their entire life, just in the five weeks you claimed to love me.
Or sit here trying to stop my head from spinning as the result of the crazy love we made.
You were beautiful…a beautiful long nightmare I didn’t want to wake from because, as I feared, your absence would devastate me.
And now I wish I hadn’t found you to be a perfect creation of God.
I wish you hadn’t come into my life just to leave me broken.
I wish I never met you… then perhaps, my life would not know such pain after the bliss you brought.
Yours heartbroken.
